cover photo: Tits Dick Ass
Listen to the PLAYLIST HERE



If ever there was a time to ritually watch a music video by trio known as the Cedar Street Sluts—who once served as GG Allin’s backup singers and then spun off into their own act just like Vanity 6 did with Prince—perform GG Allin’s original composition “Sluts in the City” on an cramped “sketchy alleyway” soundstage complete with a blatantly fake “bum” (the newsboy cap being his most bummy feature) eyeing the girls nervously as they bump and grind and pose like three office workers from New Hampshire who decided to dress up like Sheena Easton and go out to karaoke and sing “Sugar Walls” as they sing in nasal-toned unison about how “I’m a bitch, I’m a sleazy whore” and “We’re the Cedar Street Sluts! We hate everyone!” then Valentine’s Day is probably the day to do that cuz you best believe I’m in luv, L-U-V…

C

…and you will be too if you watch the video above but that’s not the only reason we’re brought you here today cuz this song is but one of 69 utterly filthy, irreverent, anatomically obsessed and totally awesome paeans to love and hope and sex and dreams brought together via the magic of music streaming in an original Deli playlist that we’re calling DELIntines Day: Lewd, Rude & in the Mood featuring no less than 68 additional viral hits (there’s a whole mini-set of songs contained within on the subject of venereal diseases) such as “You Fingered Me Weird” by DickLord, “Sit On My Face Stevie Nicks” by the Rotters, and “Oral Sex With A Caterpillar” by Jerry Jamrag & The Afterbirths so you see the level of depravity we’re dealing with here…

…and speaking of depravity there’s two count ‘em two NYC bands that lead off the playlist with two brand-spankin’-new songs about tainted love RELEASED TODAY with the two acts in question being Homade and Tits Dick Ass and I don’t believe it’s hyperbole to say both these songs are the Zen perfection ideal of what a Valentine’s Day song should be, i.e., full of snotty disregard for the heteronormative, Hallmark-card pieties of a holiday that telling erases the already fine line between coupledom and consumerism to which the best forms of protest are the practice of either total debauchery or willful withdrawal (both well represented on the playlist!) and by the way when it comes to the latter Happy International Quirkyalone Day to those who celebrate…

…and who better than slutty-and-proud-of-it “bad girlfriends” to lead us out of the wilderness which happens to be the primary subject of both songs as made clear by the mere title of Tits Dick Ass’s “GF from Hell” and in case you were curious about the province of the band’s name TDA are named after the old parlour game where someone names three celebrities and then everyone pretends they’re Ed Gein who’s just murdered the three celebrities in question and now must decide which of them has the best Tits, Dick, and Ass (respectively) since he’ll be using their body parts to finish assembling the Frankenstein’s monster he’s been working on in the basement so you can see why the game is sometimes called Fuck, Marry, Kill for psychopaths…

….but anyway back to TDA—known in some circles as the Hardest Working Trans-Fronted Feminist Punk Rock Band in Show Business—this tranarchy-endorsing power trio fronted by Julia Pierce sound like a million hollars by scholars of squalor on this their sonic-steamroller of a debut single (plus they don’t look too shabby either, I mean, who doesn’t love a drummer in bondage gear?) and really I can’t recall a punk rock combo who were both this doomy and this dancey since 45 Grave first haunted the shabby storefront clubs and gritty dens of iniquity of Eighties LA/Hollywood with TDA coming off on the whole like an amped up/turned on/pissed off version of Joy Division covering “Bela Lugosi’s Dead” with detectible filaments of Birthday Party, Teenage Jesus and the Jerks, and early Hole also to be found in their sound…

…and now lastly but not leastly and only moderately yeastily, this brings us to the officially designated Bratz of the Lower East Side, a four-piece collective known as Homade who’ve been featured in these pages before in both full-band and side-project form and truly the Homaders have outdone themselves once again with thire new single released just today called “Broken Hearts” (a longtime live fave) with lead singer Lola D. fully embodying the photo found under the word “tongue-in-cheekily superciliously bad girlfriend” in the dictionary with a stirring sung-spoken monologue that starts off all David Johansen/Mary Weiss like with Lola declaiming “Boys never wanna just kiss / they wanna cuff me” and then once the music kicks in “you dick-game is aight / but I’m scared that you love me” soon admiringly that “I get off to broken hearts and broken things”…

…which totally embodies the Sluts in the City/Quirkyalone ethos described above as the song builds and builds like a boulder careening down a mountaintop in an electrifying blur of schadenfreude sorcery and lucky for New Yorkers everywhere if you feel like getting felled by TDA’s steamrolling sonic attack and Homade’s careening Heartbreak Express then you can do just that tonight at The Broadway as the bands celebrate V-Day with a double single-release party alongside local faves Pons and Theophobia which is but one of the numerous VD-celebrating-and-eviscerating performances planned for tonight so be sure to check your local listings (in any city or burg!) or simply visit the Deli’s Instagram page and check the feed for the relevant flyers… (Jason Lee)

 

And here it is: the long-promised/threatened second installment of the 2022 record roundup (read installment one here) cuz as far as we’re concerned 2023 won’t truly start until February at least…

PRETTY SiCK — MAKES ME SICK MAKES ME SMILE (September 30)

Pretty Sick’s debut full-length Makes Me Sick Makes Me Smile is all about “teetering on the precipice” and being “tether[ed] to one’s own self-destruction” so in other words Tuesday, plus all those other thing that “still keep me up at night” this according to Pretty Sick’s singer-songwriter-bassist Sabrina Fuentes and MMS/MMS’s vacillation between states of queasy ecstasy and exquisite agony will most likely keep you up late as well should you choose to listen…

…an ideal soundtrack to confront your demons by during a dark night of the soul but equally ideal for freeing your demons to dance with the Devil in the pale moonlight (speaking of dark knights!) with Pretty Sick’s triple-threat musical attack—a tempestuous troika rounded out by guitarist Orazio Argentero and drummer Ava Kaufman—throwing off sparks like a downed power line at a fireworks factory…

…and for a native New York City-bred, Gen-Z digital native raised in a city where kids roam the streets like feral cats decked out in digital fur who started a rock band at age 13 and a modeling career not too long after before getting so jaded by the city, the hedonism, and the industry that they packed it in and relocated to London after being accepted to Goldsmith’s Contemporary Music Program but who now splits time between NYC and London I’d have to say that Sabrina’s songs are surprising relatable…

…casting her lot with the maladjusted and the maladroit no matter where they live and who can’t relate to a song like “Human Condition” that’s about how even in a world full of enablers and exploiters the biggest enemy of all is still found within (sorry, Whitney!) whether due to addiction, ambition, or whatever (at least that’s what we think it’s about) and the music video (dir: Frank Lebon) takes this message to the next level with its literally-mind-blowing parable of the psychosis of living in a hermetically-sealed screen culture not to mention the coolest car-crash aftermath sequence this side of “Allen Street”…

…and, finally, since you asked Makes Me Sick Makes Me Smile was produced by Paul Q. Kolderie who’s known for his work on career-making records by the likes of Radiohead, Pixies, Dinosaur Jr., and Hole and speaking of Hole most coverage of Pretty Sick is all like blah blah blah Hole and blah blah blah Smashing Pumpkins and sure “The Grunge is strong in this One”



but on MMSMMS there’s also strong echoes of T. Rex meets Suzi Quatro in full-on junk-shop glam mode on the song “Bound” and of Cheap Trick’s ‘70s-era power pop perfection on the song “Heaven” and of the sparkling alt-rock melodicism of Tanya Donnelly’s Belly on the song “Dirty” so give it a spin and draw your own conclusions before tipping over the precipice and into the chasm of your own imminent self-destruction…

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CHARLOTTE ROSE BENJAMIN — DREAMTINA (April 22)

“I like to daydream. I'm like Ferdinand the Bull. My teachers would always get angry because I would just stare out the window all day, completely shutting them out, and I didn't even realize I was doing it.” — Charlotte Rose Benjamin

If Makes Me Sick Makes Me Smile is a record about losing sleep then Dreamtina is about taking refuge in dreams—Dreamtina being the coming out long-player by Charlotte Rose Benjamin—dreams about, for instance, feeling truly alive on a perfect New Year’s Eve (“Heatstroke Summer”) or going to the Mall of America and never coming home again (“Deep Cut”) or posing for a scandalous Internet pictorial in a convenience store parking lot (“Cumbie’s Parking Lot”) or simply spending the day making up stories in your head (“Slot Machine”)...

…all of which Mick Jagger understood inherently and so did Devo too, namely, how modern love and economics and politics are driven by a culture-wide, pervasive sense of dissatisfaction amongst its lovers/suitors and consumers and citizens alike—it’s life the lifeblood of society in other words—meaning that any singer-songwriter worth their salt in societal relevance is always going to preface the word “satisfaction” with the phrase “I can’t get no”…

…and Charlotte is plenty salty on Dreamtina or as she puts it on her TikTok-endorsed hit “Slot Machine,” “I like martinis dirty and tequila dry / I’ve been unsatisfied since junior high” and it’s telling that even her song called “Satisfied” is actually about just the opposite with the Notorious C.R.B. tongue-in-cheekilly wishing a world-be paramour the “satisfaction” of seeing her rock out with her band at a house party, winning the deep admiration of all in attendance thus causing the would-be paramour to realize the error of his ways in passing up such a talented hottie but instead she gets flustered by this dud-of-a-dude being at the party and plays “Cumbie’s Parking Lot” in the wrong key…

…it’s a story as old as time itself and therein lies the charm of Dreamtina or one of its charms anyway in introducing a strong songwriting voice that goes all in with stark immediacy/vulnerability but with a leavening sense of bratty humor or “irreverent/insouciant wit” if you prefer, a balancing act that’s reflected in the music itself—equal parts folksy rock and frothy pop…

and even if Charlotte Rose Benjamin is far from a Southerner (which also applies to a certain country-turned-pop-singer-songwriter who’s name starts off the same as Taylor Dayne’s) it’s still surprising that Nashville hasn’t come calling (yet?) for CRB cuz who else is writing relatable but clever, hook-laden, acoustic-guitar-based folkish-countryish-but-still-rock-n-roll story songs on this level who can also pull off pink cowboy hats and fringed western wear fashions quite so convincingly so seriously you best get to it Music Row and in the meantime let’s hope this Sweet Charlotte never feels the need to hush hush…

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MATT EVANS — SOFT SCIENCE (November 18)

And speaking of people who can’t be silenced, percussionist/improvisor/sound sculptor Matt Evans definitely falls under this category which I would not have known if not for the hardest-working woman in show-booking-business Laura Regan (Footlight Presents) who presented a bill featuring M. Evans at Ridgewood, Queens’s long-time anchor-of-the-community bar The Windjammer (est. 1982, and where else can you still find a $5 beer & whiskey combo in this city and not just at happy hours) alongside Issei Herr and WSABI which as the fates would have it ended up being co-presented by the Deli and how damn cool is that…

…which turned out to be fortuitous cuz not only were WSABI and Issei Herr awesome but the show culminated in one of those magic moments that even at the time you know you’ll never experience again in the same way and it started when Matt Evans was getting set up to play his headlining set celebrating the release of his new LP Soft Science but his sampler (crucial to the new material) chose that moment to crap out which would no doubt freak out your average human being with a roomful of people waiting to hear them play…

…but not Matt whose gentle smile and demeanor never wavered as he explained the situation and his intention to instead play an improvised set starting with solo explorations on synth-and-trigger-pad-assisted drums followed some group explorations with the guitarist, bassist and the flautist there to help him realize the Soft Science numbers (or not!) and with that he launched into his first “drum solo”…

…which was a long way from Peter Criss sweating under his stage makeup pounding out variations on the Bo Diddley beat (all due respect to the Catman!) with Mr. Evans instead taking the audience on a subtle yet sublime sonic journey jumping from tension to release, from introspection to exorcism, like a pirouetting ballet dancer performing an off-the-cuff-but-all-the-more-magical-for-it-tour-de-force…

…and this is even before Matt had the entire audience close their eyes and launched into a percussion-assisted story from the point-of-view of a caterpillar or was it an earthworm (can’t remember for sure) burrowing up the surface of Earth for the first time encountering a series of strange and potentially injurious if not outright fatal occurrences having left its familiar warn, brown bosom with every moment of the adventure brilliantly acted out in sound on the drumset and synth as Matt described the scene, for instance, a giant foot nearly crushing the caterpillar etc…

…and then once the aforementioned musicians joined Matt—likewise playing their instruments in a very non-rock manner—the bar was raised yet again as hinted at in the video above (nothing stands in for being there tho’) and even if you’re not hearing any of it here you should still go check out Soft Science which is it’s own delightful journey from the skittering beats and wobbly synths of “Saprotrophia” to the crystalline dreamscape of “Alocasia” and I’m just now realizing that this album’s basically like a plant-based version of the caterpillar story, i.e., all about the “inner life of plants” and here’s what Matt has to say about it on his Bandcamp page…

…“Soft Science” is like reading through a biology textbook as if it were a collection of poetry and watching the letters slowly re-arrange until it reads more like science fiction. The album is a “mostly-not-chill” collection of brightly-hued maximalist miniatures, combining squiggly free drumming and alien synthesizers. The album sews together equal parts millennial iconography (mushrooms / house plants / anime) and retro-futurist sci-fi (Sam Delaney, THX 1138, Ursula Le Guin) in an expression of waning utopic yearning. The sound varies widely, from the breathing synth intro of ‘Saprotrophia’ to the lush breezes of 'Alocasia' and crunchy chaos of ‘Scump’ featuring (respectively) like-minded off-world sonic travelers David Lackner and Ka Baird...

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VENUS TWINS — RAXIS (October 7)

...which at last brings us to the record that’s so hardcore we had to save it for last and that’s RAXIS, the debut mosh-pit-filling full-length by Venus Twins who unlike the Cocteau Twins or the Thompson Twins are made up of an actual pair of twins—identical twins at that and no one else—who may actually be from Venus which is believable cuz their blistering music sounds like it’s from the hottest and brightest planet in the solar system even if these days they split their time between Denton, Texas and Brooklyn, New York…

…both locales being well-known hot spots for undocumented Venusians like Matt Derting who has a bassline game as unrelenting and powerful as Serena Williams while being vocally aggressive too while Jake Derting draws on speed, grace, and an expansive wingspan to serve up a volley of ferocious strokes much like Venus Williams so you can see why they’re called “Venus Twins”…

…I am going to crack open your skull and scoop out the brains and eat a bowl of Fruit Loops out of it like I’m freakin’ Euronymous from Norwegian black metal legends Mayhem and then I’ll take your skull to that weirdly fancy blowing alley in the basement of the Port Authority Bus Terminal where maybe a few other human skulls have been deposited before over the years and use it to bowl a perfect game full of back-to-back Turkeys…

…or something roughly along those lines and by the time this song Cuisinarts your eardrums you won’t even mind because the Venus Twins fed your grey matter to their cats seeing as Jake and Matt are strict vegans and would never even remotely consider eating brains even the brains of a primitive Earthling…


 

..and what makes these ten tracks all the more brain-scraping is having them delivered by a dynamic duo who look like they could’ve pretty recently got work as body doubles for Danny Bonaduce on the classic ABC ‘70s sitcom The Partridge Family if you zapped them back in time to the show’s hardcore 1970s shag-carpeted set plus it’s amazing to think about the twins giving David Cassidy and Susan Day a heart attack when they started pounding out the Zappa-meets-Slipknot demented majesty of “Don’t Take Fix (You Are A Skelton)” or the Melvins/Mudhoney/Tad-adjacent demented majesty of “Angry Sludge Infinite” that is until it turns into a Brian Eno track near its end…

…and as someone who grew up in North Dallas (near Denton!)m and who lives in Brooklyn now I can verify for a fact that Venus Twins are the most Denton-meets-Brooklyn-Zen-diagram-of-aweso me-weirdness ever--a DNA double helix formed from one strand UNT-spawned avant-garde jazzbo, proggy avant-rock experimentalism and one strand straight-up Brooklyn-spawned down ’n’ dirty, gritty ’n’ grungy, garage-y noise-punk like if the Cramps invited the Residents and Bad Brains to a tea party and I can’t think of a better way to end this column… (Jason Lee)

Home Entertainment have released a new single called "A Lot to Take On".

The is the Post-Punk trio consisting of Matthew Balzekas, James Brown, and John Fitzgerald.

You can catch Home Entertainment at Cole's Bar on December 29th with Urine Hell, NÜDE, and Scrambled Porn. They will also be performing at Empty Bottle on January 6th with Hard Pet and Allen Epley.